mean girls

I just watched the movie mean girls again but this time it wasnt in the movie house nor our DVD... it was at cable, the thing is there were soo many realizations of the character Lindsay Lohan and that the movie revolved about HS life... and it reminded me why things are just like it is now... the problem with the "E" I mean it tough but what kept the person going, the willingness and the togetherness, the help of friends... as my bg bro said after watching the movie: how surprising it is when you watch an old movie again after you ahve watched it again and again before, makes you feel that you've watched it for the first time... that what makes our group special, no matter what whether you call it "over exposure" or waht have you is because no matter how long or short we've known each other we all get along some how...no matter how many times we've watched and seen each other we still find each other amusing(regerdless of our short commings) I mean as they say If its me thats changed it just like another character said so "I admit I'm mean and move on" i'm not indenial and acting nice when your not, but the thing is I'm not always like that, thats at times, at times when I feel used, at times when I feel that someone only needs me for something I've got that they want, at times when I expert all my effort to support and in the end find that it was for nothing. nothing meaning it wasnt even recognized in the way that the person didnt even noticed I excerted effort...

Wierd how things wrok, I have a friend who loves watching mean girls everynight with his sister at home. and when I found that out I told him that "you know what I've watched that movie a 1000 times also" I can maybe memorize the lines and mybe also memorize the story line but 1 thing I forgot was the true essence of the story... it was about Trust, Friendship and respect... I mean I know I can be a jerk but Its for a reason, sometimes you have to analyze what have you done and what can you do...friendship can't always go your way... as they say it takes 2 to tango... I only get angry when i sense that theres an imbalance... and that if its rationl then its fine but if its just plain barbaric then what the hell, see sometimes we let our animal instinct tak over us and forget to seee the bigger picture...
I just really hope...
I dont wanna lose hope...